So this rant begins as a lot of things do nowadays, with K-Pop. A few weeks ago, diva Lee Hyori released a track called “Swing” ahead of the release of her fourth album. Bear with me, this is important, I swear. Within days the video appeared.

WARNING YOU SCARY MOTHERFUCKING PUSSIES, THE FOLLOWING LINK CONTAINS A CLOWN!!!



Now despite the depth of the MV's implied storyline most of the discussion provoked was along the lines of “I fucking hate clowns. Augh, DO NOT WANT.”

So that nonsense got me wondering. Clowns aren't all that bad. In fact, they're entertainers.



I'm inquisitive by nature, so my mind immediately started working to figure out what possible trauma could've led to such an illogical, compulsive hatred. The most prominent and commonly admitted reasons is Pennywise of “Stephen King's It”, a 1990 television miniseries.



Unfortunately, I had responsible parents, so I managed to avoid any trauma that could've been inflicted by watching a horror series involving the murder of children. I actually didn't watch it until after I began to brainstorm for this post. As an adult Pennywise is darkly humorous, creepy and downright fucking eerie. He is a suitable boogeyman, but in the early 90s we had enough real boogeymen to be afraid of without allowing fictional ones to dominate us. (Man in the white van, anyone?)



All in all, “It” is an enjoyable flick, a bit overlong due to it being a miniseries, but to date, no nightmares (I'm writing this blog over a month since I first thought of the idea). My conclusion: If your parents knew you were watching this back in 1990 (for reference's sake, I would've been 5) and allowed you to, they were either shitty or evil. (My money's on evil.)

Now that the prerequisite discussion is out of the way, off to journey into further supposition as to figure out the root of your stupid, stupid fears.

On the list of horrifying TV shows that was moderately okay for older children to watch back in the 90s, “Are You Afraid of the Dark?” topped it. The show's setup was a group of kids (The Midnight Society) meeting together to tell ghost stories around a campfire. The stories were then acted out for our pleasure.

Relevance:



Never saw “It” as a kid, but I saw this. It didn't create a phobia of clowns, but I did grow up to be scared of Funhouses. Honest to God.

Clown Hate

Okay, here we go, diving waist deep into the Clown Hate. Hope you brought chest high waders and a hazmat suit to traverse this shit ocean.

Operating off of my assumption that clowns are intended to be entertainers, and humorous ones at that, there's an easy way to dislike clowns. Nowadays, with all of our access to high brow comedy (yeah, I'm laughing too) clowns seem dreadfully passé. For the most part, they just seem to fail to meet the requirement of being funny, often falling into the realm of just sad, then pathetic, then “wow we should probably laugh to make this dude feel better” and finally into “holy shit it's hilarious how much his life sucks”. Now this doesn't say that there aren't talented clowns out there (btw, has anyone seen a circus lately?), just that our exposure to birthday party clowns would probably leave a bad taste in most people's mouths.

I don't ever remember watching his show, but as a kid I saw commercials for it a lot, so my early memories of what a clown looked like were this guy:



Bozo always seemed like a pretty cool guy, he wears a bald cap and pom poms and doesn't afraid of anything. Wait, where was I?

Right, bad clowns. Bozo wasn't particularly scary, but he was kind of creepy, in that whole wow, this creepy old guy is trying far too hard to entertain children sort of way.

More Legitimate Evil Clowns

John Wayne Gacy If you don't know about this guy, you aren't truly afraid of clowns, and you don't really know much about pop culture. While he did present a serious threat as a murdering birthday party clown (and I'm willing to go on the record of saying that he's probably maybe the only one we have on record), Mr. Gacy was only a threat if you were a young teenage boy between the years of 1972 and 1978, and he's pretty dead right now.


What? I watched Scooby Doo as a kid. Remember, that just like this one, it's just a man in a suit, and they can all be defeated by doobie smoking hippie teens and their dog too.


Next is that fictional diabolical madman and Batman's eternal archnemesis “The Joker”. I could wax poetical on him for hours, but then I'd end up not completing this post and it's already headed past three pages. If nothing else, the man is dedicated to both comedy and evil, and he has a strange sense of honor.

“Harley Quinn” is his sidekick, lover and former psychiatrist. She is also the source of many a nerd boner.



(Don't ask me for the other parts of the episode either, just know it's called “Mad Love” and is pretty awesome).


Hisoka, also known as straight pimping, the clown you'd never want to fuck with, and “Protect your hole or he'll take your soul” is the fifth main character in the Hunter x Hunter manga and anime series, but the man cleanly steals the show. He is of course, as we mentioned here a sadistic pedophile that is made of so much pure win and awesome that you'd probably sacrifice your son's virginity to him in a heartbeat, that is, if he doesn't murder you first because it's a day of the week that ends in “Y”.

Not Evil Fictional Clown (See I can make this even more anime-related)


Pierrot isn't evil. I think. Anyway, he's kickass and so is his little wonder of a show/manga. See what we thought of him here, SPOILERS: We think he's pretty fucking hardcore awesome, almost as great as Hisoka, except for the whole not being a sadistic murderer bit. (Not going to swear on his not being a pedophile though).

Positives of Clowns

Now, Clowns aren't all that bad, in fact they do quite a few things for the betterment of society (also money). This is going to be in list form cause it's getting long.

• Balloon animals (these are marvels of modern engineering)
• Face Paint (Oh don't even act like you don't want a spiderman mask made from cheap paint)
• Candy
• Limited Magic Tricks
• Slapstick Comedy (One of the few original American styles of comedy)
• The two hosts of this awesome podcast Keith & Chemda used to work as clowns before their 'cast hit it big and they now live off of it. (Not that I'm jealous or anything).
• Just all of this

Now, to return to my original intention of figuring out just what makes they with coulrophobia tick (Want to go deeper into it than just me thinking they're nancy boys). I know there's probably some sort of animal instinct that tells us to fear or fight that which is covered in makeup that makes them unrecognizable as a fellow human being, and the desire to wear outrageous colors, a rubber nose and giant floppy shoes isn't exactly common. You just can't, as a sane human being look at someone that dresses up as a clown and think to yourself “Wow, this person is just the poster child for sanity”, and you're probably right.

Why Clowns May Be Slightly Crazy

• Children Suck (This is universal fact, if you've ever worked with young kids, you know they can be equal parts angelic and equal parts pure unadulterated spawn of Satan. Working a thankless job like “Children's entertainer” only exposes you to even more of their dickery.)
• Parents suck more (Seriously, when you hire someone, please actually supervise your spawn instead of just subjecting them to the kid's evil while getting drunk/fucking your mistress in the backyard (lol euphemism)/hanging out with your pals.)
• Degrading yourself for a paycheck isn't fun at all, or healthy. (Especially if you have the “It's just a job” mentality. If you truly love it, good on ya, hope it works out.)

Why Clown Haters are just Bedwetting Pussies (tl;dr PUSSY)

Ah, the ad hominem part of this post. I'd go into more detail, but I'm pretty sure the following is mighty straight-forward.

• At two years old you're afraid of anyone in makeup (Your parents were shit for hiring a clown at an age where you're too young to comprehend that it's just a person in makeup, not some sort of horrifying man-beast that wants to claw your face off and eat it).
• Stephen King's It is just a movie/miniseries/whatever, Pennywise won't summon himself or nightmares in any body of water and pull you into his deadlights. It just won't happen.

And finally, when it comes to forming this fear, I bet none of you have a documented case (in your own life) of a clown abusing you or a close relative. If you do, I'm truly sorry for your lots.

















Almost made it through this post without throwing up this pic. Coulrophobes,

Consider this the first episode of a new wave of mecha related episodes. For the one person who listened to our old episodes, you may remember episode eight. That was the beginning that would lead into the more Skype centered format that most of you are now used to. We no longer had a proper place to record so we experimented in different places. We picked the wrong place on that one. Also, we no longer had the backbone of our show available to us to provide a proper subject for the episode. We picked the wrong one. We literally thought up the idea of doing a mecha episode the second we started recording. As usual, we were all over the place. To make for it, I decided to take a page from Madhouse and just remake the episode into something better. I bring over Sketch of Too-many-things-to-name fame and we talk about three mecha shows. We lightly jog though Godannar, pick up the pace with GaoGaiGar, and end with a full run through Gurren Lagann. I cut out most of the yelling so it ended being less than three hours.

Click here to download episode (Right-click and Save As)



(0:00 - 9:12) Intro

Consider the beginning the new gimmick for these episodes. I lost track of how many times I told my Gundam story. I am sure you are going to end up hearing it more times in the future. I am not going to lie to you; this was recorded a few months ago. Sadly, First Gundam and Zeta have been taken down from Crunchyroll for a while now. Wing is still on there so maybe I will finally finish it now.

(9:13 - 27:28) Review (Shinkon Gattai Godannar)

It was really hard to put my love of this show into words. I think it is safe to say that this show may not work with everyone. The initial hurdle is the fanservice this show has. Why this show works so well is that they play it so seriously. There might be boobs exploding out of someone's clothes and no one acknowledges it. Not to say that it is not deliberate, but the attitude of being such a tongue-and-cheek show speaks volumes. With the recent trend of moe centered shows, if they take a similar approach, I am sure they can make another winner. No, Strike Witches does not count.

I would like to take a moment about a subject that was overlooked in this section of the episode. That being: The best running gag of the entire show. There is character by the name of Tetsuya Kouji. For those who don't know, he is an obvious parody of most hot blooded robot pilots. He even shares the name of the two leads of Mazinger-Z and Great Mazinger, Kouji Kabuto and Tetsuya Tsurugi respectfully. He is essentially the one you expected to be the lead in this show. Unfortunately, he gets hilariously taken out in every robot battle. Again, this is why I love this show. Every time his robot gets broken, everyone always acts like he died and never acknowledge him again during the battle. The last thing I want to mention about him is that he is the final link between all three shows: He is voiced by Nobuyuki Hiyama.

Here is the trailer that Sketch was referencing.



(27:29 - 28:15) Earcatch

The Unofficial One Piece Podcast How was the con?

(28:16 - 58:08) Review (King of Braves: GaoGaiGar)

This chart can better explain to you what you will experience in GaoGaiGar.



A clip of the dub WITH DAN GREEN!



You are going to be getting a lot of that when you watch the series, but it is worth it to get to FINAL. Just by me looking up clips for the notes, manly tears are shedding and they can't stop. It is kind of an endurance challenge for me to watch the Perfect Yell version of the opening. Only when you are done with the series and FINAL, you can attempt at the video. The video itself is so spoiler heavy that it is only best viewed after you finished everything.

(58:09 - 59:34) Earcatch

Animeshon Really like the new promo by the way Josh.

Way to fail there Sketch. Here are links to his stuff.

The UnAbridged Podcast They talk about abridged series. I don't know what else to say about them.

Sketch's YouTube Channel Sadly, his One Piece Abridged account got taken down, so here is his channel.

(59:35 - 1:59:17) Review (Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann)

Spoilers everywhere.

(1:59:18 - 2:01:08) Closing

Next Time: East meets West. Who will survive?

Please feel free to leave a comment or contact us via email at: SSAApodcast@gmail.com

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I love the fact that we did this episode when Zach was not around to make him tell us his two cents. Who am I kidding? He has his own show for that. Since the failure that was our One Piece episode has slowly been erased from the feed, we thought it would be best to fill that void and give you an unbiased opinion of the current happenings of the One Piece manga. Of course, if you have already downloaded this episode without reading the notes, you might have just screwed yourself. This is going to be a spoilerific journey through the current arc, where we will grade the individuals (that matter) and give our opinions of who really made the grade.

Click here to download episode (Right-click and Save As)



(0:00 - 5:35) Intro

I will eventually buy at least the first volume of the manga. Right now, I am not in the right position to be making such demanding purchases. Until then, I will be marathoning the Blu-ray versions of Claymore, Ouran, and Samurai Champloo on my newly constructed computer while I wear my replica WWE United States Title belt over my sholder and alphebitize my current collection of anime and manga. I am not rich.

OK. Here is the explanation for the grades:

First letter is for achievement.
Middle number is for attendance.
Second letter is for conduct/effort.

(5:36 - 12:54) Discussion (The Arc In General)

I don't know if there are words to properly explain why I am not as impressed with events with the arc. I am not saying that was a bad arc, it just seemed like there were some unnecessary parts. I am sure seeing this in action will make up for me being slightly disappointed.

(12:55 - 34:34) Discussion (The Main Actors)

In the previous recording, we actually gave Luffy a 'B' in this arc. Unfortunately, I happen to not be recording everyone else's audio. I am sure had that not happened, we might have been a little bit more nicer to certain characters, expect for Moria. He deserves what he got. I hope someone caught that Clue reference. Best movie adaption of a game ever made and possibly ever will be.

The Grades
Luffy: D1A-
Whitebeard: A2A
Ace: C1A

(34:35 - 36:01) Earcatch

Orange Anime Podcast So, are you guys dead or something?

Animeshon Podcast Seems like you came back from the dead.

Jammer's AniMovie Podcast You are too new to be dead.

(36:02 - 59:42) Discussion (The Warlords)

I really miss Rocko's Modern Life. I am usually reluctant to do my Moria impression. I guess since I am usually forced to do it while a chapter with him is being read. You kinda need me to let it come naturally. Otherwise, it sounds so forced and unfunny when you to cue up the role.

The Grades
Moria: F3D
Don Flamingo: A1A
Hawkeyes: B2B
Boa: C1A
Crocodile: B2C
Jimbei: A1A
Kuma: C3A
Blackbeard: A3A

KUNG-FU TREACHERY



(59:43 - 1:17:37) Discussion (Various Pirates)

This shows that we are not the blind fanboys that encompasses most forums. We love the One Piece and all, we just can't be bothered learning every single person's name. I know Oda is The Jesus and one is told not to fuck with said deity, but I'll worry about the characters if they show up again. When that time comes, you will hear me saying, "Oh, him."

The Grades
Marco: F3C
Diamond Jaw: F3F
Mr. 3: D3B
Ivankov: B1B
Cut Man: C3D
White Bay Morgan: F3F
Mr.1: B1B

You can only do it once.



(1:17:38 - 1:50:50) Discussion (The Marines)

You have too much time on your hands to be able to remember every Marine's name.

The Grades
Various Vice Admirals: B2A
Garp: EXEMPT
Smoker: D3F
Hina: D3D
Coby: F3D
Sentamaru: D3F

Aokiji: C2B
Kizaru: F1F
Akainu: A1A

Sengoku: F1F
Goat: A3F

(1:50:51 - 1:52:54) Closing

We don't get a chance to talk about One Piece that often. I don't know if the demand is needed to talk about it right now, so we won't talk about it until we are provoked.

Please feel free to leave a comment or contact us via email at: SSAApodcast@gmail.com

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Hey everyone, Doc here. If you have not been following our Twitter account (and why haven't you? You're missing out.), I mentioned we have an announcement to make. No, we are not stopping the podcast. In case you haven't noticed, the first five episodes of the podcast are no longer in the feed (The fact I made this post bumped off an extra one). Though I am happy that no one will be able to listen to those terrible episodes, I am sure some of you would still want to. Don't worry, they will still be linked on the right side of the site as direct downloads. The issue now becomes that as we produce more shows, you will start seeing less of the older shows on the feed. I know that a good amount of those episodes are gold, and I don't want new listeners to miss out on them. So, I decided to do something drastic.



It's no secret that I have been making this show on the cheap. When we started the show, I did not have a stable source of income. So, I looked at every single way I could produce this show for free. The site is on Blogger and most of the episodes have been uploaded to Archive.org. This is something you can get away with when you are starting podcasting. Long story shot: It looks like I've exhausted my resources. I thought it would be better for everyone to start migrating to something more stable. If you followed me on Twitter, it makes it look like I am sitting in a gold palace with all my recent expenses. As I've been saying on there, #DoctorIsNotRich. The migration process will be costly, but it won't hurt me that much (I'm glad I don't play World of Warcraft). This is where you guys come in. If there is one thing I hate, it's when podcasters are always asking for donations to help the show. I am sure there are ways to make money off the show, but I don't want this to be my primary source of income. I'm sure I could "sell out", but I think that breaks the illusion of our show (hey Funi, give us stuff...). We have a donate button on the on the right side of the site. Give us what you think we deserve. There is no minimum or maximum. This show is free because we like you guys and that is never going to change. By the way, the same rule applies if you donate: You donate, you can come on the show. I may do some sort of listener call-in extravaganza or, if it's only our one listener, a regular episode.

We are still producing shows and we have a lot planned for the future. We are here to stay.

Welcome back everyone. This is episode 53 of the Ass Backwards Anime Podcast. Just in case you didn't notice, this is the episode where we talk about Trigun. We mainly cover the anime on this one. If one of us decides to read the manga, we may report on that later. Until then, you are going to have to listen to us go up, down, and every which way about this show. We did not do this one alone though. We got Zach from the Unofficial One Piece Podcast to stop by and give him a break from fanboying about pirates. This one is surprisingly short, but worth a listen.

Click here to download episode (Right-click and Save As)



(0:00 - 5:25) Intro

No one seems to learn that I am almost always recording when they are on Skype with me. I want to mention now that we talk about the ending of the series very early on. If you don't want to be spoiled, you can listen to an older episode where I am sure we spoiled a different show.

(5:26 - 7:42) Discussion (Racism?)

I'm sure I crossed a line somewhere in the making of this show. It's funny that we never got a complaint about what we say. I just assumed no one was listening. Not to say that all the positive feedback is bad, we love that you guys find us entertaining. I guess I just want some sort of hate mail for once. I know we are doing something wrong that pisses you off. Don't try to send a fake one though. I want to taste your anger. It should taste like grapes dipped in chocolate. Wait, have they ever made chocolate covered grapes before? I suddenly feel like having that now. It's such a strange concept.

(7:43 - 9:13) Earcatch

Jammer's AniMovie Podcast Well that's original...

Unofficial One Piece Podcast The fact that you were on this episode Zach made me not want to put your promo in it.

(9:14 - 24:35) Discussion (Where Were We?)

I guess you can consider this part as the overall plot section of the show. We will make sure that Foxy is recording near a NASCAR track next time. Hopefully, there will be less noise there. I love how Zach quickly stated that he liked Disney movies when he was a kid. I thought those movies were timeless. Is it wrong to like a Disney movie when you get older?

They're finally getting married!



(24:36 - 30:42) Discussion (Would You Pull The Trigger?)

This could be the first time in a while where we sounded like we knew what we were talking about. This is a very interesting topic that we may go back to in the future. I guess it shows that this series is one of those shows where you really need to sit down and think about what is really going on.

That damn cat...



(30:43 - 1:08:16) Discussion (You Can't Take The Sky From Me)

As per our usual ass backwards fashion, we jumped back and forth between so many topics that I thought I should just group everything in this section together. It just shows that there so much to talk about. We may have to start creating bullet points for the notes next time since we can never seem to segment into proper topics when we cover only one show. Something that I am glad we didn't delve into were the Gung-Ho Guns. Some of the best parts of the series came from them. Even with all the talk about the major plot points, I still consider this a strong recommendation to watch this show. Sadly, there has not been any rescue of the series so far. If you can find a way to watch it, check it out.

It's modern time. There, I saved you two hours of your life.



You should have watched this movie already.



(1:08:17 - 1:19:50) Discussion (He's a frog)



(1:19:51 - 1:21:30) Closing

I peaked at the end when I yelled "Love and Peace".

Please feel free to leave a comment or contact us via email at: SSAApodcast@gmail.com

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No, this is not an April Fool's joke. This is a real episode. Seriously. I'm not joking. We talk about the new anime that are coming out. We even announce the winners of our contests.

Click here to download episode (Right-click and Save As)



(0:00 - 20:46) Intro

We spent way too much time talking about old Nick shows. I actually forgot that we were recording at some point. You are probably asking: "Hey Doctor, why don't you just cut that part out of the podcast?" To that I say: Screw you. There was no way around this segment apart from doing it over again. Even if we did, what kind of ass backwards podcast would we be? Here is a playlist of a few episodes of Roundhouse just to prove that this show exists.

(20:47 - 1:17:48) Discussion (Spring 2010 Anime Preview)

Here is the list we were using. There are quite a few we may end up talking about in the future. You are probably asking now: "Hey Doctor, why didn't you cut out the part where you paused?" To that I say: Please see above statement.

Video title says all.



(1:17:49 - 1:28:13) Discussion (Recent One Piece Events)

Big spoilers in this section. You better be up to date.

(1:28:14 - 1:29:55) Earcatch

NPC Podcast Sucks you got to go back dude.

The Unofficial One Piece Podcast The show is finally getting to you, huh?

(1:29:56 - 2:22:51) Mailbag

Even though this is under the feedback section, we do announce the winners throughout it. I want to thank everyone who participated in the contest. I should have emailed all the winners by now. If not, email us as soon as possible. Keep sending feedback people. Ed, we may need your help in the future...

(2:22:52 - 2:26:04) Closing

A few days after this recording, Foxy said All That wasn't as funny as she remembered it. Now, like every episode of Roundhouse, time to reprise the theme song and roll the credits.



Please feel free to leave a comment or contact us via email at: SSAApodcast@gmail.com

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